My eyes cannot find the strength to stay open. I no longer care what happens for breath is appreciated but sleep is cherished. My love is forbidden, and I myself have yet to find total acceptance. Why dwell on impossibilities? Lay this to rest and I will follow behind just as always. There is a feeling of bitter thoughts that pass between taking what used to seem whole, but when there is nothing needed to be done old times are revived. The weekend drags by seeming like one long day rather than three. We disregard a clock set crooked on the wall and venture out for a walk in the morning dew. My presence has been here before as well as another close being that has since passed. It was here that we found death and gained life for the last time. In these woods I have memories, and once again I have returned to reminisce and share. Confession escapes my lips, but only after you spoke of secrets first. There is much to be said, but we forget after we speak leaving a revealing conversation unfulfilled. In this state of mind I can see why fear and shame exist, and I have learned not to regret.
January 30, 1998