Now I know what journal writing is for. If a cause is needed at all, or some sort of explanation for directionless chatter and worldly ideas, than let it be for the sake of maintaining an identity, but most of all, sanity. I suspect I have been “letting myself go” for I am forgetting how to be or when to see – the point has been abandoned again. Yes, there hasn’t been anything worth writing about, but another view reveals the truth of a million brilliant verses conjured up from nothing out of the ordinary. I love making excuses for myself. Without the guide of a pen I am able to justify or even recognize the reasons for my ways. I have mutated into a drone where self-absorbed days are required for survival and the theory of natural selection is robbed of its authenticity.
December 25, 2000